When I’m living an alpha lifestyle, I don’t think in specifics about people, I think in principles. I look at facial expressions, and I think they’re happy/sad/angry, so I have to react in a certain way to change that emotion to what I want it. Everything blends together, it’s just situation, goal, action to achieve my goal.
When I’ve slipped, and become a beta herb, I start thinking about people, especially the women in my life, as unique little snowflakes that each have to be understood in a different way. Every one is different, but not that much. People are much more alike then they are different, and it takes very little calibration to adapt to different people’s life histories. And the more effective mental models I have of people, and the way we fit together as a system, the less I slip into the beta, over empathetic role.
Much of my empathy has gone away as I’ve gotten older. It’s a default response to a lot of behavior, unless you’re a psychopath, because it protects you from being a complete dick and alienating those around you. Which can be detrimental to your well being when you are at the bottom of the food chain. When you’ve aged, you should have done enough reading, effective video watching, and real world experience, that you know what needs to be done, not what you feel should be done. You even know that when there is no clear answer, you will put one foot in front of the other, and find a way. If shit still happens, well, not everyone gets a prize. You can only control your effort.
This is when you’ve truly become a man, when your life is about reaching goals, and you will do what is necessary. It’s not just women, that have been fed the bullshit line that if they’re not haaaaapy, then something is wrong. Men are taught to find their calling, which destroys a lot of men. Happiness is not a goal, it’s an occasional side effect when you achieve something worthwhile. Sometimes you get no happiness from achieving a goal. This is life, not all goals will make you happy, they just need to be done. Men deal with it.